Colorado Dreams: PA 4: My last time with Gram (And some past visits too)

We headed up to see Pap & Gram on Wednesday morning We talked, played Crokinole, ate lunch from Subway that Matt and Nathan ran to get, and tried to keep the boys in check. I remember them needing our attention more than we wanted them to that day.

I also remember Grandma realizing she forgot to eat something and her sugar dropped really low. She sat down and had something to eat. I think that's when Matt went to get lunch for all of us too. While Josh and Pap tried to work on getting coins unstuck from their gumball machine! It was obvious Gram wasn't feeling herself. Though only slightly. Gram always powers through and its hard to tell sometimes when she's not feeling good because she hides it so well. We discussed some pain she was having in her hands while playing Crokinole. She said she went to the chiropractor and it improved when she went to him.

It's crazy looking back at some our conversation. We talked about Davey & Amanda Blackburn who lived in Indianapolis. Amanda was shot and killed in a home invasion back in November. We were talking about how that story had really impacted us. Grandma noted seeing it on my Facebook. We talked about death. I remember saying to them that I had heard recently if we really understood death and what awaits us as followers of Christ, we would not try so hard to escape death! That Amanda Blackburn's best day of her life, was actually the one that she lost her life...because she got to meet Jesus!

It some ways I feel like I might have trivialized the difficulty and pain in dying. For the one dying as well as those who love them and are left on earth. I know in my heart it's true, but they are big words for someone who hasn't tasted the pain of dying myself or even losing a close loved one. But the conversation was interesting in light of what lie ahead, nonetheless.

At the end of our visit, as always Gram says we can stay longer! We knew that they had a something at their church that night, so we really wanted to make sure they had time to be ready and rested for that. Plus, the boys were getting hard to keep in line and it was wearing on us! It made it hard to talk to Pap & Gram.

I vacuumed for them before leaving and we started to head out. We didn't have the camera out until the very end of our visit. I remembered right as we were leaving that Gram had wanted me to type something up for her. I think it was her paper that she wrote for her Doctorate that she received years ago. She went to look for it. She came back and said she put it somewhere for me, but couldn't find it. We decided she could scan it and email it to me. That never happened. And I still haven't been able to figure out what it was she wanted typed out. I need to ask Pap.

This photo I would normally not keep. But it's the scene from my vantage point.

This is what we did. Typing this, tears are beginning to flow. When we go home, we always carved some time to see my grandparents. Over the years, it's looked different with the boys. We used to be able to go play games for hours with them! They would tease each other and Pap usually won! Once Nathan was born, he'd actually nap for us in the guest room downstairs and we could still play! Once we had two, it got harder, but we still did it, of course. Even lunch got more complicated with kids. I think one time we left the boys with my mom. But I also am glad that Nathan and Josh got to know my grandparents too. I have rich memories in these last years of precious time playing games and sharing stories with my grandparents. So even though I can't say this last visit was the "best one ever", because that would make a better story, I know it's not all about one moment in time. It's about the culmination over the years of the time spent and experiences shard that culminate in their legacy in our lives. And watching them partner together in so many endeavors through the years...including grandparenting...is something I will always cherish.

A few snaps before leaving. I always have more photos of Pap it seems! He has had so many health issues, it always felt like he might be the one I'd never see again on earth.

(Josh being a doggy.)

These boys LOVE Princess.

How I miss you Gram! I can see it here. You are not 100% But you look like a queen. I might just have that sweater you are wearing now. Smelling it reminds me of hugging you! I had no idea the last hug I would get from you would be this day.

I always knew my Gram loved me. My biggest regret is not calling her more.

The guys!

Whew. That was tough. Now for some photos of previous visits with Gram:

BEFORE kids! These two were so much fun to play Crokinole with!

Her laugh. :)

Pap being silly!

With a 9 month old in tow!

Nathan napping while we play!

And look who woke up!

Love.

Another visit. More games. Probably Nathan napping again.

Ha ha!

I think this is when I came home on my own in spring 2012. I was pregnant with Josh.

And there's the stinker! He LOVED laying on Gram :)

This was a visit when Pap was very sick. He was in the nursing home next door. I remember visiting with Gram without Pap just not being right.

A Sunday they let him visit from the Nursing Home.

They stood by each other in tough times.

Believe it or not, only 5 months later in November. Pap can still beat us all playing Rook. I was SO exceedingly grateful to be able to play games with my grandparents again!